2002-03-13 -

Grumpy Villains

OK, bear with me here for a second. I have a vague memory that at some point England tried to ban whiskey from Scotland, on the theory that the big crazier in kilts might settle down without if they staid sober for a week or two.

Anyone know if that's true?

If it is true, does it have any relation to the traditional song "Whiskey in the Jar?" Or is the whiskey in the song just there because all good Irish highway robbers like to drink good whiskey?

I worry about these things, you see, despite being neither a drinker, a robber, or demonstrably Irish.

Anyway...

Today was another grumpy Liralyn day. Judging by the number of times this week we've heard her pouting "hmmph" noise, she's reached some sort of developmental milestone that can only be fully achieved once the persuasive potential of grumpy behavior in every possible situation has been thoroughly researched.

Psychology tells us that punishing her only adds more negativity to the cycle and we should try withdrawing a positive instead. Psychologists are deluding themselves. Telling her she couldn't play with pillows this morning just made her mad. If she was anyone else's daughter I'd be suggesting withdrawing positives like air and food, but since she's not, those are out of the question. After all, she'll rule the world someday, and I'll want to be on her good side.

If anyone knows a good book on how to raise supervillains that love their parents, please leave a note in my guestbook.

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