2002-05-19 -

Friendly With Exes

Another weekend, another North gig, more sleep lost, more work not done. The usual routine.

I ran into Jacqueline at the gig, and we had a very civil conversation. I was a little relieved; the first time I was her when she was back in town felt distinctly awkward.

See, Jac and I dated a little bit while my current SO and I were split up, before Liralyn was born. It wasn't exactly a grand romance; it was mostly a "we've flirted with each other for years, and here we are both single, so let's go out" sort of thing. Some of my friends thought the whole idea was irresponsible, but I was basically insane at the time, so I ignore their opinions. The relationship ended politely but suddenly, and then we just didn't see each other again for a long time. She moved out of the state, for career reasons, and I figured that was that.

Then she moved back, and I was feeling sort of weird about it. I mean, I was back with Julie, and Julie's not entirely keen on the fact that I was dating while she was pregnant. (Never mind that she was the one who broke up with me- this isn't about logic.) Since I'd been pretty much out of my gourd when Jacq and I were dating, I also had a vague feeling that I ought to be ashamed of something or other. I hadn't done anything wrong, per se, but I didn't exactly do anything *right*. So it was weird.

Anyway, we talked tonight about various stuff, and we were friendly, and I felt good about it. Perhaps I've finally developed the ability to really be friends with the people I used to date. Of course, I intend to be with Julie for the rest of my life, so this ability is perfectly useless to me. Damned planet.

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